It's a weekday, about 8 or 9 in the evening. You've had a long day at work, or a long day with the kids, or both. You've managed to get through the dinner hour. Everyone's fed, dishes are done, kids are bathed and off to bed, and you are finally able to relax. You have this small space of time in the evening that's yours, and you are soooo looking forward to it.
Articles in Category: Relationships
How to Maintain a Good Connection Over Time
Someone recently asked me what the single most important factor is to a long-lasting, healthy relationship. Big question! I can come up with 10 things pretty quickly, but to try and choose one above the rest is difficult. Nevertheless, I have come up with one answer which I believe embraces many of the important facets of good relationship.
6 Ways to Avoid Competition in a Relationship
There are many behaviors that can slowly destroy a relationship, and "competition" is at the top of the list. Keeping a mental list of who does the most, one-upping, being oppositional regardless of the situation, excluding your partner in social settings, comparing assets (both personal and material), and the worst one . . . always turning conversations back to you when your partner needs you to listen.
Are You Defensive?
So who among us hasn't been defensive? Don't fudge! We all have. Certainly there is a time to defend ourselves, but for the most part, we engage in being defensive when it really doesn't help our cause. True defense is different from defensiveness. Being defensive implies that we don't really feel secure in our own thoughts, actions, beliefs or whatever the challenge may be. Of course when we feel attacked, it is a natural reflex to defend the fort, but really, how effective are our defensive actions? Usually not effective at all. That's because as we defend, the other side increases the attack, and we get into a vicious cycle of attack-defend, attack-defend, and on and on with no real resolution and bad feelings all around.